Hello, world.

So I start a new blog, Eudaemonia, towards the end--but not quite--of the first semester of my senior year. It's an odd time to start, methinks. So what am I doing here?

I just finished a long conversation with an old online friend. I had not talked to him in years because of a conflict we had, but we have both decided to look past that conflict and try to be friends again. It's worked, for the most part. He is still that fun guy I grew fond of with our mutual love for general nerdiness. At the same time, he is also that arrogant prick I grew to despise. Now, I first got to know him when I was in high school, when I thought I was mature (what, assuming I am now?), trapped in my Catholic high school and video game bubble.

As far as Catholicism went, I recognized that I hold little faith in it, but I still respected it for what it was, as well as for the great education their kind of school gave me.

Then there was my friend I mentioned earlier, who had this popular modernist worldview that all religions, especially Christianity, are backward, for the uneducated, full of lies, etc. He rolled out the usual refutations of the Bible--the problem of evil, the multiple contradictions, the ridiculous laws it contained that, for example, justified slavery or cruel treatment of women. I already knew, as a wee high school girl, that my friend's refutations rested on very simplistic understandings of the Bible and Christianity. One flaw, for example, is that official Catholic doctrine embraces evolution. Yes, friend, the Bible can actually be interpreted on something higher than the literal view, and in multiple ways. The ends of these conversations either trailed off into nothingness or to him admitting that, perhaps, he had more of an issue with certain groups of religious people rather than religion itself. Progress, perhaps?

Tonight, he brought up questions about religion and the Bible again. And his views apparently had not changed after all these years. He brought out the same refutations, the same notion that religion has no inherent worth, and so on. At this point, I could at least use my advanced studies in religion and postmodernism to better articulate my thoughts. Again, though, the conversation eventually ended up like before, and I have a good feeling the conversation did not open his mind up as much as I had wished.

Reflecting on his lack of value he saw in religion, I concluded that he probably has not had very many enriching experiences with religious people or people of different cultures. I am sure that, despite the tons of money he owns, he still must not have traveled out of the U.S., let alone out of home state or Florida (for family vacations, of course). He is probably still deeply affected by the zealousness of his parents' Baptist church and the Bible-thumping South he lives in. This is understandable, and the act of writing about it calms me a bit. Yet he very much exudes the gamer and fantasy reader he always has been, and now I see this in a negative view: at his age (mid-twenties), he is still trapped in his self-serving world of video games, LOTRO, and Star Wars.

I got quite disgusted after rationalizing all of this. How could he live such a selfish life, not really serving others, not really going out there and experiencing the world, and not expanding his mind? At this point the adage that education is not limited to the classroom struck me hard.

At the same time, this whole conversation and the disgust I felt helped me to discern what I did NOT want to do with my life. I have been struggling with this for a lot of this semester. I had contemplated on, after all, having a simple life with simple pleasures--going to work 9-5, coming home to play video games and eat, spend time with family, and sleep, and then getting up to do the same thing again. What was wrong with the simple life, I thought. What was the point of me chasing after these prestigious programs or finding difficult things to do just to challenge myself? But after talking to my friend, I found that I at least don't want the extreme end of the simple, selfish, close-minded life.

And so goes the creation of my new blog, Eudaemonia. I chose this name because I feel that I am truly on a journey now in finding my own virtuous life that makes me, for the most part, happy. And what is happiness for me? That is what my journey is about. I at least know, at this point, that I do not want that simple, selfish life. At the same time, after my happy rejection from Teach for America, I know that I do not want that chaotic, completely selfless life. But more on that later.

For now, I must sleep. But in the meantime, I say, welcome to my blog!